Lin and Bumi: Joker and the Chief
by Anniered
Summary: [Contains: Swearing/sexual content] Bumi's advice to Kai on love surprises all in the small group present at the Air Temple's Bar, none more so than Lin. After hinted exchanges Lin decides this mad-man might be worth a chance. Contains smut and somewhat terrible puns. (linumi, bumin)


**_1._****_In the Night_**

Lin watched as he spoke.

He was moving his arms around as he gave a definition of his version of love, the sixteen year old airbender, Kai, listening intently. They both swayed ever so slightly, the alcohol in the systems making it tricky to keep still. Though it could have been from the shanty they had just finished bellowing, or the laughter from the various stories, Lin wasn't really sure by this point.

They had been all drinking for hours now, Lin had approached the group after she heard them from the courtyard. As she got nearer to the noise, she recognised the story as one her Uncle Sokka had told long ago, many times. It was the time that his father Hakoda and best friend, Bato, had accidently started an uncontrollable fire, in a blizzard. Lin didn't want to make it seem like she was interested, but she quickened her pace in hopes of catching the end of the story she had heard so many times. As she rounded the edge of the colossal bar, she almost knocked over the young airbender, he was ducking away, having been hollered to join by a loud voice. She liked Kai, as he reminded her of Mako, the shady past come good. Though she quickly turned annoyed when she realised he was spying on the group of drinkers, Lin hated spies, "_Didn't anyone tell you it is rude to eavesdrop_?" she had said to him as she forced him out into the open to reveal himself, in the same sentence, she requested a drink from the _commander_ of the whole assembly. In the hours that followed, she watched the young man down drink after drink, the group laughed and sung, teasing and quipping Kai.

But this isn't who she was interested in.

Bumi was the foremost antidote to the small gathering, he had a story for every subject, a joke for every occasion. He would smile and laugh, howl and hoot, he made a ridiculous ratchet, Lin hated noise. On top of all that he said, he seemed to be going out of his way to make Lin blush, or smile, or even react. She initially held strong against his charm, _if I can get a three thousand, two hundred and eighty-eight word report done on a Friday night, adjacent to a full holding cell without physically reacting to the scum inside it, I can ignore Bumi. _Though, after a few phrases, she did find herself holding her body differently. She would stretch her legs out before her, crossing her ankle and straightening her back. She would hold her body in a way that looked flattering, _urgh, why are you doing this? Knock it off, hussy._ She growled to herself, she took a deep sip from her cup, watching the banter that would break out amongst the group. She zoned out for a moment, analysing their opening exchange in her mind, all the while, convincing herself that she was not interested.

"_Pour me a glass, Commander._" She had ordered at Bumi.

Bumi had smirked in her direction, not removing his eyes from hers as he poured her a drink, "_Anything for you, _Chief_._" He had then slid the drink down the bar, she caught it without even trying. He had spoken again, "_What brings you across to my part of the world?_" he then continued with a genuine smile, though Lin assumed he was being nosey.

After she had shot her drink, he sent the whole bottle sliding towards her.

"_I was told to take my '_vacation'_ leave. And here I am, nowhere else much interests me._" She had internally pouted, _nowhere else wants me…_ She let her eyes slide across to Bumi, trying to let venom seep into her stare, "_Not that it is any of _your_ business._"

"_I _love_ it when you are _feisty." Bumi then winked, Lin noticed that everyone around them had tried to hide their giggles, they were watching Lin scowl, she hoped they hadn't notice her and try to fight a smile. _Gah, _she thought, _I should have said something… Why should he have the last word?! I should of said something like, 'I bet there is plenty more you love about me…'_

_What the fuck… Where the fuck did that come from?! Maybe you should stop drinking before you say something like that out loud…_

"Bumi, how do you know when you are in love?"

Kai's almost inaudible question brought Lin back from her thoughts, the whole group was suddenly quiet. _Here comes the noise, the immature comments, the jokes…_ Lin thought with a sigh, she took a sip of her drink.

A smile appeared on Bumi's face, it wasn't the usual smile he had when he had teasing his siblings, of trying to make everyone laugh. It was the kind that made his eyes shine and his cheeks glow, it made him look younger. Lin was furious that she almost became lost in that smile, she shook her head quickly. Bumi opened his mouth, "You can't stop thinkin' about her! She is always on your mind. In your heart…" Lin held the cup centimetres from her mouth, she was surprised. For someone who had been drinking, he held himself well.

"You just want her to know that she is perfect, even when she thinks that she is pushing you away. You are just looking for a way to prove how you feel!" it was easy to see that everyone in the group was listening intently, as was Lin. Bumi lifted the cup to his lips and took a deep sip, as he lowered the cup they made eye-contact. She sitting at the bar across from him, and even from there, she could see as his eyes slid down to her body. His smile returned from earlier, when he was trying to make her respond to him. The tone of his voice altered to match is mischievous expression. _What is he looking at?_ She thought, she cocked an eyebrow at him, he spoke, "You just want to tell her… Show her, that if you had one wish! It would be to get under the layer of metal armour she coats herself in, to keep the world out..."

_Oh no he didn't…_

"And make it crystal clear,"

_Oh yes he did…_

"-that she is everything that is right in the world. Your world."

There was a moment of silence.

"I mean, come on!"

_Don't you-_

"Her skin,"

_I swear to the-_

"-her stare…"

_Oh! For the love of-_

"And those legs!" he was enjoying this, hoping that he almost had her smiling, "Mmmm. _Mmm_!"

Her grip tighten slightly on the cup, she struggled to keep her face indifferent, _he is dead, _she thought. On the other hand, she tried to remember the last time anyone had said anything like that too her. She was pulling up blanks, she hadn't had a person tell her she was attractive or worth the stress in a long, long time. There was a feeling in her chest, it was light and made her feel like she was about to blush herself into a pretty-pink frenzy. _Am I… Flattered?_

She knew she didn't have much time, with the alcohol in her system, she couldn't even tell how long she had before the blood would pool in her cheeks and she would become a laughing stock. Lin hated not having control.

She looked down at the glass in her hand and the almost empty bottle next to her arm, she quickly lifted the cup to her lips, finishing it.

The bottle followed in quick succession.

She pushed herself up from the bar, she gripped the base of her shirt and tugged it lightly, straightening it. She made eye-contact with Bumi again, this time, she scowled at him. She wondered if he would understand that this was her admitting that he succeeded in getting a response. She quickly reached for a full bottle, turned, and begun walking towards her room. She spun the bottle around in her fingers, smiling as the blush finally coated her cheeks, she knew none of them could see.

She waited until she rounded the corner and started heading up the stairs, she pumped her hand twice, knowing that this would cause the stone beneath his feet to pulse. She continued to walk up the winding stairs, wondering idly what would happen if he didn't receive her message, or what would happen if he did. Lin hated uncertainties.

She left the door of her room open, she cracked the top of the bottle. She was in a guest room, there were two single beds and an old desk, her suitcase sat in the corner. She turned and peered towards the door, no one was there. _What have I done? I am such a fool… _She counted to thirty, before she turned and looked again, still not there, _desperate, desperate, desperate, despera-_

"Knock, knock." Came his voice, she spun, catching the desk, the bottle still between her lips. Bumi looked nervously at Lin, he was internally freaking out, _what if I imagined it? What if I have officially overstepped… She could tear me to shreds in sec-_ The door slammed closed behind him, he spun towards the sound, as he turned back he was slammed against the door.

_If I am going to make a fool of myself, I am going to do a damn good job. _She had her hands grasping the front of his shirt, "Listen here, _Commander_," she growled, "I don't want to hear you utter a single word during this entire exchange, and if I do, I will wrap my cable around your neck and squeeze."

"And here I was expecting some tender lovemaki-" Bumi started, Lin silenced him with a firm hand over his mouth and a glare.

"Shut. The fuck. Up." She growled. Bumi smiled beneath her hand, his arms were around her waist the moment she had collided with him, he used his body and his grip to push her back across the small room and into the desk.

"I don't think you make the decisions in this room, _Chief_." He winked as his lips pushed against hers. They were warm, and smooth, he opened his mouth to deepen the kiss and Lin mimicked his action. His body was immediately excited as she moved her hands to his hair, gripping the scruffy mass with one hand while the second clawed at the top of his glider suit. His hands were on her hips as he lifted her onto the desk, her legs wrapped around his waist almost immediately. She pulled him into the kiss more, his hands realised her and slammed onto the desk at either side of her hips. Her fingers felt for a way to undo his clothing, she could feel metal on his back, she flicked her finger and the zipper tore open.

His sigh came out as a groan she pulled the cloth from his torso, not breaking the kiss, his arms were free in seconds, curling around her again. They were dark, warm and covered in tiny scars, encasing her, she was not familiar with this, at least not since-_Not a good time to think about the ex when you are intending to screw the brother._

Her last few flings were cold and distant, lights out, voices low, no excessive touching. Lin hated them leaving at midnight, but hated waking up to them in the morning. She felt Bumi's fingers dig into the back of her shirt before tearing it from her shoulders, she growled against his lips. His fingers unclipped the back of her black bra, she let it stay against her chest as his hand ghosted over the bare skin of her back. He slipped her out of her pants and she dropped her metal armour she wore when '_off-duty'_, she tightened her legs around him.

Bumi could tell she was in some kind of hurry, even if she didn't want to say so. Lin didn't strike him as the kind of person who liked being handled, he could taste the alcohol on her tongue and feel her impatience. He was still trying to make him react to her, he started by tearing her shirt from her and tossing it to the floor, he was expecting a rise. He wanted a rise, he had known her for years, she had never been one to disappoint when it came to reactions. She had growled at him and he had smiled against her teeth, her skin was cool to touch.

His hands moved beneath her and cupped her ass in his hands, he lifted her from the desk and turned towards the bed. It had been a few years since Bumi had hit the mattress with anyone, and when he had, he was far away from home and had since lost contact. He never looked back on any of his lovers with distaste, they were all warm, loving people.

His lips guided over her neck, as he lay her down on the mattress. He pulled the thick, heavy blanket over them, and left the candles glowing around the room. He had kicked the rest of his gliding suit off on the way to the mattress and lay in only his boxers, his body pressing down on Lin's.

Inside Lin's mind was a disaster, everything she hated was happening, _urgh, lights. Urgh, under the covers. Urgh, all this contact. _She had to admit, he had lost a staggering amount of weight since he had become and airbender, his body was firm and his muscles were tight. She rested her hands against the planes of his stomach, running her fingertips across where the muscles distinguished themselves, there were a few nicks and divots here too, _how could the son of the world's best healer, have so many damn scars?_

Lin had intended the act to be sensual, though, to Bumi, this action felt tense.

He pulled back from her neck, looking directly into her eyes, he scowled slightly.

Then he smiled at her, it was the same smile from earlier, the smile that lightened his whole face, "What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?" he said.

Lin blinked twice, her eyebrow cocked into a confused expression.

"A _stick_!" he said, chuckling loudly at his own joke.

Lin was unimpressed, "What are you-"

"How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"

"Bumi, I swear to-"

"_Two_, if they are small enough!" he sniggered again, burying his smiling face into the crook of Lin's neck. "Get it? _Screw_ in?" He pulled back after his laughing died down and looked intently at her, still beaming ridiculously, "Listen Linny, you may not realise it, but you are one hellofva catch. You need to lighten up, now I almost got you smiling at the bar, and I am not getting off you until you crack a gloriously genuine grin."

"Good luck with that, asshole. I don't laugh easily." She said, scowling deeply.

"A man walked into a bar..."

Lin held her scowl.

"He still has the bruise to prove it!"

Her scowl faltered, _oh crap, that wasn't actually too bad. _She knew the alcohol was not helping her stay focused, but now that she knew his aim, she couldn't help but feel her mood lighten. She exhaled sharply from her nose and tried to wriggle out from under him. He held her tightly, smiling broadly, "What does the Cabbage Merchant use to fix his cabbages? A cabbage patch!" he laughed again.

"That one was terrible." She said, a small smile threatening to break out.

"You give me one then!" Bumi said.

Lin thought for a minute, _am I really going to play his games? _She realised that she was, because she liked the idea of a lover wanting her differently, he wanted her to enjoy this. It was true that Lin had never given anyone much of a chance to have a different type of sexual experience. Yet, it was also true that none stuck around to make she had actually enjoyed the one they did have, _would letting Bumi take the reins be so terrible?_ She took a deep breath, "What did one braless woman's breast say to the other?"

Bumi turned his head on an angle, "What?"

"We should probably get some support, or people will think we are nuts." There was a short moment of silence, before Bumi roared with laughter, Lin tried to keep her smile hidden as she wiped a speck of salvia off her cheek. He had never heard her say a joke, or use language that colloquial. Bumi rolled next to her, laughing harder. "What do you call cheese that doesn't belong to you?" Lin continued.

"_W-w-w_-what?" Bumi was barely able to get the word out.

"Nacho cheese." She smirked, he roared loudly, resting his nose against her shoulder.

"Have you ever noticed ostrich-horses don't wear clothes?" Bumi said, "They're _neigh_-ked." He started laughing again, Lin smiled a little wider.

She internally groaned as she used a joke from Bolin's flight a few years ago, she still remembered it, "What is the coolest dessert?", she sighed, "_Sup'_ cakes."

"If Zaheer is standing on the horizon, does that mean he is Zafar?" Bumi snickered, still laughing as we wiped his eye, "Just thought of that one."

"What did the police officer say to the Equalist Spy?", Lin said, remembering the joke from a fellow officer, "Amon to you."

"What did King Bumi say when he got mud on his new shoes?" Bumi said, Lin raised an eyebrow. "Oma Shu!"

She chuckled, the sound slipping through her lips, she hoped he hadn't heard it. He had, he pulled back, "You did not hear that!" she said with a threatening tone, lowering her eyebrows into a scowl.

"Did you just-"

"No…" She lost her smile, holding onto her usual, bitter glare.

"You just-"

"What is the point of this?" Lin said, crossing her arms over her chest, "If this is how you get someone in the _mood_…"

His smile shrunk, until it was barely visible on his lips, "I won't lie to you, Chief." He said softly, propping himself up onto his elbow, "You seem like the type of woman that has wining, dining, fucking and chucking downpat. You probably don't even let a lover get you a coffee and the newspaper in the morning, and there is nothing wrong with that! Now, how you view the act of sex is your own opinion and one you have the indisputable right to bear. And, if that is how you want this night to happen, it will. But, I think you should let me take the reins on this one, let me show you what you deserve. See if I can change your mind…" Lin blinked twice, Bumi smiled a bit wider, "If you hate it, we will stop and never have to speak again… Unless you want to..."

_Let him have you. _

"On one condition!" she said quickly, "Could you _try_ and be adult about this?" he didn't answer as he moved his body to be above hers again, lowering his weight as he settled his hips between her thighs. His mouth was on hers in a moment, catching her lower-lip between his teeth and gently gnawing. She tried to catch his mouth with her own, but he was too quick as his lips blazed a trail from her own, across her jawline and over her scars. The previous partners usually avoided the scars, most likely terrified of setting off some kind of emotional breakdown. Lin simply thought of them as old wounds, even forgetting she had them most of the time. His tongue was warm and smooth as it trailed over her breasts, as he was finally able to remove the bra from her chest. His mouth silently caressed each of her breasts, above him, Lin sighed and smouldered. She couldn't bring herself to believe that this was the same man she had just told to behave, her hands gripped the sheets on the bed as his nose skimmed across her stomach.

He had been moving his body down as he ventured, leaving Lin completely uncovered. She hadn't realised how warm his chest was until this moment, the cold air making her uncomfortably cool. She felt his fingers manoeuvre her underwear from her hips, she desperately tried to remember what kind she was wearing. She was almost about to check when a pair of warm hands separated her thighs, she took deep breath as the hands tightened slightly, he was teasing her. His lips pressed against the inside of her leg, moving inwards, his tongue making small circles. She resisted the urge to buck her hips, the sensitivity was maddening. Lin kept her body in top shape, both for fitness and personal reasons, she knew that there was nothing that he should find unattractive about her, but still she wondered.

Lin took a slow, deliberate breath as Bumi released her leg, she glanced down at him, he was looking at her. His eyes appeared to be smiling, Lin watched him curiously as he placed his index finger and middle finger into his mouth. A shudder ran down Lin's spine as she watched him slowly withdraw his fingers from between his lips, the action was arousing, she bit into her lower lip. One of his hands still had a tight grip on her thigh, he lifted her leg slightly and placed it over his shoulder. He didn't take his eyes from hers, as he leant forward and slowly allowed his tongue to encase her clitoris as his fingers pushed into her.

His fingers were warm and experienced, his tongue had her body quivering and pining for more. Lin could not believe the man who had teased her relentlessly when she was younger, the man who she had absentmindedly viewed as _'an nice-looking idiot'_, was this skilled of a lover. Bumi pumped his fingers slowly, he had learnt that if there is too much happening, it can have the opposite of intended result. _Keep the focus on her pleasure, _he smiled internally, his tongue dragging itself over her clitoris, _ladies first_.

Her fingers held fistfuls of linen sheets and mattress, her mouth was slightly opened, small sighs and moans rising from deep within her body. She tried to peer down at him, each time their eyes would meet, the strangest mixture of arousal and shame would rise inside her. She compared it to reading extremely erotic novels while gorging on Fire Nation chocolate, she released the sheets from between her fingers and tangled them in his shaggy hair.

She wanted something stronger, something deeper. She glanced down again, one of his brown hands gripping her white thigh, the muscles of his back moving almost seductively as his fingers moved into her. His grey eyes watching her, still they managed to smile, though Lin knew his lips were preoccupied. Something inside the bottom of her stomach began to stir, it began to spin. She felt like her legs were floating in warm air, his tongue moulding her, making her body want to fly. She didn't mind so much about what his fingers were doing, she was focusing only on his mouth massaging her.

It was almost as if something had alerted Bumi to Lin's thoughts, slowly withdrew his fingers from her, sliding both arms under her legs, propping her hips up and gripping her waist. His tongue rolled and danced over her, her eyes were squeezed closed as the feeling of climax rose inside her. She swore loudly as her orgasm crashed over her, Bumi heard his name mixed amongst the cusses and almost smiled. He moved himself up her body, pressing his lips against the soft, firm skin. He kneeled up straight, his body shining in the candlelight, the uneven surface of his skin was oddly pleasing. He tugged on his boxer shorts and _grinn__ed_ at Lin's expression as his erection sprung free.

_Well_, she thought with an eager smile, **_that_** _definitely runs in the family..._

She barely had time to compose herself as she heard the sound of material hitting the floor, and felt Bumi hook one of her legs high over his hipbone. His body pressed against hers, he moved himself to her entrance, feeling the warmth. Her body was still on a high as he pushed his erection into her, she threw her head back with a loud groan, his lips were against the skin of her neck in a moment. He thrust into her at a consist rate, rolling his hips, holding her knee higher. The entire experience was passionate and exhilarating.

Her arms were still out beside her, crawling into the sheets again, the pleasure raked over her, as if her body was still riding out her climax. In the years she had been single, she hadn't been with a lover that was this considerate of her experience. Usually to no fault of theirs, she just wanted the away as soon as possible after they had finished, and none were too willing to stick around. Her body seemed to vibrate with happiness as she moaned his name loudly, his lips pressed against hers. His tongue pushed into her mouth, their lips moved together and Lin removed her arms from the linens and clawed at his shoulder blades. There were two more strong, deep thrusts before Bumi slowly withdrew from her body, without a word, he pulled her from the bed and walked her towards the desk, bending her against it.

Her breasts and navel lay against the cool surface, she could feel him moving behind her, he gripped her ass in his hands, his thumbs making deep circles in the flesh. There was a moment when his hands released her that she thought he must have been finished with her. She was about to throw a cuss word of impatience in his direction, when she felt his erection separate her ass and his hands grab her hips. He pushed into her again, the new angle and depth sent Lin reeling. Her hands gripped the edge of the counter, the metal that framed the desk crumpled under her fingers. Instead of rolling his hips, the new position allowed him to rock them roughly, Lin responded with a string of sounds that made Bumi think he was listening to a symphony. All times she had yelled at him, snapped at him, called him names and told him to shut-up, had nothing on the enjoyment he was getting from her words now.

Her body lay before him, her muscles strong, her skin smooth. Bumi felt an overwhelming sense of desire, he wanted her to be his, not just for one night. He knew Lin was not one for giving praise when it is not deserved, so he knew he was doing well. He felt himself beginning to come undone by the warmth and the constriction of Lin, he wanted to see her as he prepared to succumb to her body. He thrust into her slowly, withdrawing himself almost all of the way, he watched her muscles contract beneath his hands. _Just a bit more… _He thought, not ready to give her up, not ready for her to kick him out. He soon realised that he didn't have long to try and finish her again, he withdrew and rolled Lin roughly onto her back, her legs almost automatically wrapping around his waist, holding him to her. She pushed herself into a sitting position, this time she glided him. She sighed as he entered her, she couldn't believe how much she had missed just having sex. She wrapped her arms around his neck as he thrust into her swiftly, he felt wonderful. Her head was thrown back as his lips kiss along her jawline, one of his hands gripped her hip, the other was wrapped around her back, pressing her to him.

He could feel her tightening around him, he moved his lips to her shoulder blades, sucking and biting the skin, groaning as his peak came within reach. He cried out her name as he let himself finish inside her, she dug her nails into his back, she didn't want him to know that he had caused her to orgasm twice. She didn't want him to have _that_ much satisfaction with himself, she silently rode out her second orgasm as he kissed her cheek, his lips trailing over her scars again.

He held her for a moment before she pushed coarsely him off her, he smiled at her as she let herself down from the table. His smile disappeared as she still walked towards the bed, turning only to toss his boxers in his direction. He looked disappointed, but he knew that he couldn't force her to change her ways. He slipped his boxers on and looked towards the door, Lin was pulling her tank top on and her underwear. He watched as she quickly dragged her fingers through her hair, flicking to get the knots out. He picked up his flight suit and nodded respectfully at her, he turned towards the door, not wanting to be a bother to her.

Lin's brow furrowed in disappointment as he turned away, she had realised that he was right. It was time she gave someone a chance to be there in the morning, he had earned it. She noticed the two decorative, metal clips tops of his boxers, she raised an eyebrow. She looked at the spare bed, then across at the bottle she had brought up from earlier, she cleared her throat.

He spun quickly, hopeful.

She looked at him, then gestured towards the bottle of alcohol on the desk, miraculously, still standing. He raised an eyebrow and took a few steps towards her, handing it to her, she used her free hand to move the second wooden bed over the stone floor, it bumped into the first as Lin sat down, taking a deep sip from the bottle, "So, Commander," she smirked, she flicked her fingers and the decorative metal clasps dropped his boxers to his feet, "Got any more jokes?"

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**_Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or the world used in this fanfiction. I also do not own the cover photo, but I cannot find a link to the owner on the website I retrieved it from. Sadly, the jokes are not mine either…_**

**_This story is based directly off my Kainora (Kai/Jinora) fanfiction, it is called 'Influence' and has a bit more about this ship. If you are interested in it, check it out. Reviews are always appreciated, and I hope you enjoyed reading._**


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